Happiness

Ok, so I will never actually take a "hockey break" (with the exception of the lockout year, in which I was quite bitterly antagonistic to the NHL and everyone's constant, grating whining on the subject), but I think I will take a hockey blog break (for today). As it turns out, my blog is not just a forum for my hockey/lacrosse rants, it's an outlet for my random musings on life in general. That being said...

Happiness. My approach to this ever-sought, less-often-achieved-or-defined feeling has changed I believe. The soft comfort and constant encouragement of God has shown me something about happiness and joy that I don't think I understood before. It's not something that's just beyond the next obstacle or something I hope to be one day; it's right here, right now. If I could pinpoint that feeling of perfect contentment this would be it: the slow, from-deep-inside smile that spreads over my face when I realize how true that really is.

I used to have some semi-conscious notion happiness meant having things. It meant having things in order, it meant having a journalism degree and being at the top of my class, it meant having a significant other to love me, it meant being the best at whatever I did and doing everything I could possibly squeeze into 24 hours.

In the last year, I have found the meaning of happiness. It means loving who I am. It means never being ashamed to be myself. It means having friends and family who love me, but knowing I have worth regardless of how much they love me. It means knowing someday I will be married and have children, but being happy right now. It means taking care of myself and not relying on anyone else to do it for me. It means soaking up every last ray of sunshine, making snow angels because I can and loving the rainy days.